Interpersonal
Communication
Basic Principles of
Interpersonal Communication
Thirty
years ago, a businessperson was generally hired on the basis of technical
skills. Since then, the world’s economy
has moved toward service-oriented, information-focused businesses that are
increasingly organized in teams. Now,
Fortune 500 companies name strong interpersonal, communication and team skills
as the most important criteria for success in management positions (Buckley, Peach,
& Weitzel, 1989; Kane, 1993), and employers consistently name interpersonal
communication skills as crucial for success on the job (Maes, Weldy, &
Icenogle, 1997).
Businesspeople
often contrast the “soft” interpersonal skills with analytical problem solving
skills, but managers are starting to discover that an ability to learn and grow
in the job is limited by an inability to “empathize or cope with the emotional
reactions of others that naturally occur” in the workplace (Paul, 1967). Furthermore, the typical business
organization is not an easy place to maintain interpersonal relationships. The diversity of communication styles and
cultural expectations, the lack of time to develop relationships, and the heavy
reliance on written or electronic forms of communication are all antithetical to
the ways in which human beings traditionally create and maintain relationships.
Sometimes
people use the term “interpersonal communication” in order to differentiate
face-to-face interaction from written or electronic messages. In other cases, people discuss “interpersonal
communication” as though it referred exclusively to personal relationships with
family members, friends or coworkers, thus distinguishing them from “work”
relationships that are perceived to be somehow different. Neither of these characterizations quite
captures the complexity of interpersonal communication within a business
setting.
As
one communication text puts it, “interpersonal communication occurs not when
you simply interact with someone, but when you treat the other person as a
unique human being” (Beebe, Beebe, & Redmond, 2002). From this perspective, interpersonal
communication can occur in writing or by email, as well as in a face-to-face
setting. Further, even total strangers
who interact with each other respectfully could be said to be communicating
interpersonally even though the topic of conversation might be trite or task
related. In short, interpersonal
communication is more about the content and character of the exchange than
about the mechanics of how it happens or with whom. The successful member of a business
organization will display a range of interpersonal skills whenever he or she
uses communication to maintain relationships, share tacit knowledge, or
exchange information about emotions, values and motivations.
Understand how
interpersonal skill functions to create an effective business organization.
People
Skills in the Effective Organization
In
a family or friendship relationship, the primary role of communication can be
simply to create and maintain that specific relationship. In a business environment, each interpersonal
relationship exists within a complex network of interrelated
relationships. As a result, the ability
to communicate interpersonally—that is, with people as people—becomes a
foundational skill for virtually any other organizational activity.
Building
Trust
No
organization can continue to perform tasks productively unless its members have
a basic trust in each others’ capabilities and motivations to continue to act
cooperatively. It is the ability of
individuals to achieve interdependence that creates organization. Getting work done requires an endless series
of complex collaborations, and spending time and energy wondering whether
others will do their part can create serious obstructions to productivity. Success depends on each member’s ability to
trust others to do their own parts of the job, to support the company’s goals
and objectives and to maintain an environment in which problems can be resolved
in a quick and effective manner.
Organizational success, therefore, is often found to be related to an
ability to build trusting relationships (Cooper, 1997).
Trust
is built on part experience with an individual—or with other individuals who
seem to be “like this one.” If I have
seen a coworker complete his sections of the design drawings on every job we’ve
ever done before, I will probably trust him to do the same on this job. I have somewhat less reason to trust a new
co-worker, of course, so I will have to make some choices. I might trust whoever hired her to make a
good decision, again, based on the staff’s performance at hiring folks in the
past. I might trust her credentials,
which she has hung on the wall. I might
trust her to be pretty much like all the rest of the people from her college or
home town or ethnic group or gender with whom I have worked with in the
past. Of course, I might decide not to
trust her, and find ways to check on the quality and quantity of her
work—perhaps discretely but possibly in an annoying, overbearing or
antagonistic way.
An
important part of interpersonal skill then, is to provide reasons for others to
trust you, and to accurately and effectively insure that you can trust
others. The reliability of a person’s
previous work is, of course, the best and most straightforward indicator, but
when that is not available we call on a host of verbal and non-verbal methods
to gauge the trustworthiness of our colleagues.
Consistency: trust is created by acting in
more or less the same way all the time.
An “even” temper, a “steady” work pace, a “predictable” response or a
“uniform” style of dress are all signals that the same behavior will keep on
occurring in the future.
Communication: trust is easier to maintain
when interruptions, failures or changes are communicated to others before they
are surprised by them. Change is
inevitable, but when communication is used to provide a warning, the change
need not create unpredictability as well.
Commonality: since we always tend to trust
those who are like those we’ve already learned to trust, a person can earn
trust by displaying those commonalities.
Rather than dwell on your degree from a different university or the
ethnic diversity of the staff, focus on finding the things you all have in
common.
Cooperation: Understand that however good
your own intentions might be, a trial period is necessary. Good natured cooperation with those who want
to keep an eye on your work will create trust in two ways: you allow others to
verify the quality of your work and you acknowledge the interdependence that is
the basis for a trusting relationship in the future.
